Almighty God

There is so much to write about, I don't even know where to begin. At times I am so overwhelmed with this mission because there is so much need that we cannot meet. I am so glad that we serve an almighty God who can multiply food, heal the sick, and comfort the broken. Other times, I am just so blessed by the hospitality and generosity of the people here.

Last Thursday Erika and I decided to clean our van during our door hours because we park the van right in front of the door so that we can still see if people come to our house. Our friends Maribel and Sergio stopped to talk to us while we were cleaning and, as some of you may know, Sergio has a brain tumor. While we talking and laughing he all of sudden turned really serious. Maribel said, "He is having a spell, can we go inside of the house??" We ran into the house, made Sergio sit down and immediately began to pray. In a short while he was better again and this time his spell didn't turn into a full blown seizure. Praise you Jesus! He was smiling and making googly eyes at his wife again. I asked him how many times he has these episodes and he said about once a day, sometimes more. Wow! Again, I am blown away by the strength of the people we have the privilege of serving.

Friday was our fun day. We take a fun day once every two weeks and Friday we decided to go Saltillo. We took Sergio, Maribel, and the kids with us. While in Saltillo, they were able to buy a thing to hook up electricity in their house and a few other things they needed. We spent time all together in the plaza in front of the Cathedral to talk and visit in the shade. The last stop of the day was at Maribel's mom's house. She gave Sergio and Maribel a washing machine as a gift. I was so blessed to see them so blessed. They left Saltillo with electricity hook ups for their house, some groceries, and a new washing machine. It was a great day.
Saturday we had home visits, and actually we only visited Doña Elvira. In a previous blog I sort of told her story, but she is the sweet old lady that takes care of her five grand kids because her daughter sort of abandoned them. Doña Elvira was telling us about how her youngest grand-daughter is doing, as she began to cry. I cannot remember the little girls name, but she is only three and a half years old and has cancer. She has been in the hospital for two years now and Doña Elvira told us she was in need of a blood transfusion and if she didn't receive it she would probably die. At that moment in Doña Elvira's little house I was overwhelmed. It is so hard for me to see the needs some people have or the sufferings they have and feel like there is nothing I can do. Again, I know that I serve an almighty God who is capable of all things.On another note, we have had our youth group for two weeks now. This week will be our third week. Kids are coming, praise God! Each week we've had around 10 kids. The first week we played a few games and talked about their purpose in life. The second week we played a few games and talked about the importance of prayer. This week we are just having a fun day and are going to either watch a movie or play capture the flag. We want to do one fun day a month so the kids have a chance to invite their friends to come see what this group is all about.As of right now, I find myself so blessed with serving here in General. I am blessed each day by one or more of our ministries. I am blessed that the Lord has chosen me to be His little missionary.

Simply Blessed

So, yesterday was my birthday and I was blown away with the love I received. Last year in September my journey in missions began. When it came time for my birthday, I was sad because it was the first time I was celebrating my birthday without any of my immediate family with me. God knew I was a little sad and he made my birthday the best one I had ever had.

Last year I spent the day with my missionary brothers and sisters. After breakfast at Big Woods everyone honored me (it's a Summer's tradition) and of course I cried, and then people gave me gifts. I think all of the kids made me cards. It was absolutely perfect. Later in the day we went to the park to have a picnic and cupcakes to celebrate the feast day of St. Theresé. (She is the patron saint of missions and her feast day is my birthday...coincidence? I think not!)

The weather that day was perfect as well. I was able to run and play with all the kids and swing, which is only my favorite thing in the whole world to do. It truly was a perfect day. I didn't think anything could top it, but God really does love me so much.

This year for my birthday, I celebrated with my Mexican family. It was the first time without any of my family, but yet again I was blown away. Throughout the whole day, four cakes were made for me. I mean I'm pretty sure I had the biggest sugar rush I've ever had in my life. In the early afternoon we had invited the kids from our youth group as well as some of our friends children to have a water balloon fight. I wish I had videoed it to show you, but it was fun and entertaining. After the water fight we all ate cake together. That was the first cake of the day that Erika made.
When the water fight was over our friends Linda and Juan returned to visit and pick up their kids. When they returned they too had a cake. Of course I had to mordida the cake, which means to take a bite while someone shoves your face in it! It was strawberry with chocolate frosting...delicious. Juan asked if he could make us lunch and of course we said yes. We just hung out and visited with them while the food cooked and then sat down together, gave thanks, and dove into the yummy food.After the festivities ended with Juan and Linda, Erika and I went to Toño and Mari's house to learn how to cook one of our favorite meals and to eat dinner with them. Mari, to my surprise, had baked me cake as well. I don't why I was surprised because it was such a Mari thing to do. She even decorated it with hearts. Truly she is a saint. Again with the mordida, and we shared delicious dessert. Most of the time I feel more at home at Toño and Mari's house than I do at my own house here in Mexico. I think it is because their house always has kids running around and it just feel cozy inside.

The last stop of the day was with my friends Armando and Yolanda. They also had a cake for me. We chatted for awhile, watched a little tv and then ate cake. I mordidad again, and Yolanda and Armando being the quirky friends that they are, really shoved my face into the cake. It was okay though because it was a delicious cake! Like I said before, I was completely blown away by the love that I received on my birthday and cannot wait for next year!

Hold On

This morning I woke up with a hunger and thirst for Jesus like I haven't had in a while. I feel as though my heart is ready for growth and change. I've been listening to praise and worship this morning and one song has really struck me and challenged me. Please read the lyrics and if you have a chance listen to it online. I hope it challenges you the same way it has challenged me. God Bless!

Hold On by Shawn McDonald

Another day gone by
And again I ask myself why
I question my sanity
Why I believe what I believe
Some might think that I'm crazy
For believing in something I cannot see

So won't you now
Hold on to me
Please don't let me go
Hold on
'Cause I am prone to wonder
Prone to leave this faith I know

Hold on
And now they say that the wise man
Well, he fears the Lord
And this fear is the beginning of all wisdom
And I must be a fool
'Cause I sure don't seem to fear you
'Cause the very things that you will me to do
Well, I just don't seem to get around to
The very things that you hate
Are the very things that I always stumble into

So won't you now
Hold on to me
Please don't let me go
Hold on
'Cause I am prone to wonder
Prone to leave this faith I know

It's a Cross-

Cross figuratively speaking: a thing that is unavoidable and has to be endured.

Last night was a rough one and my cross reared its ugly head. I’ve said now, for quite some time, that my anxiety is my little hell here on earth. It is the biggest cross that I’ve had to carry. I don’t battle with it as often as I did in the past nor does it paralyze me now as it did, but when it comes, it comes with a vengeance. Last night when it came, the littlest things like breathing became a battle. I prayed, but in frustration soon gave up, knowing that the night ahead was going to be a long and hard one. I finally

passed out and woke up this morning groggy wanting to sleep the day away.

After breakfast Erika and I prayed Christian Prayer and I felt like the Lord was speaking directly to me. “As they go through the Bitter Valley they make it a place of springs, the autumn rain covers it with blessings.” Psalm 84:7 After Morning Prayer I spent some time thinking about the above verse. I felt like the Lord was saying to me, although you feel like you are suffering right now, I will rain down blessings amongst your suffering. I felt Him say to me that it is my chance to be united with Christ in a very small way.

Everything I read after Morning Prayer spoke to me. I read from The Imitation of Christ by Thomas A Kempis, “Blessed are the single-hearted, for they shall enjoy much peace.” The whole idea of peace, having peace, and enjoying much peace started the wheels in my brain turning. I started thinking of peace in my life and what I expect it to be like. I have this vision of peace being my whole body, well mostly my physical body, being completely calm. The actual definition of peace is freedom from disturbance; quiet and tranquility. Last night and with every anxiety attack I’ve had, I often prayed for peace, and felt that the Lord didn’t answer my prayer because my physical body wasn’t experiencing the peace I desired. After last night, I realized that I am able to always have peace, and that is peace in my soul that cannot be disturbed or taken away by anxiety. I can rest in knowing that my soul is at peace because the Lord is right along side with me riding out the storm. After all, it is such a small storm in hindsight.

Of course I woke up this morning wanting to have a pity party. I wanted to keep an attitude of, “Poor me, my life is tough. I have this huge cross that I like to call my little hell on earth because it is such a big burden to bear,” but I was awakened to reality. A dear friend of mine, Lucy, came to the door. As she sat down, she told me she didn’t sleep much last night either. She began talking about why she came and what it boiled down to was she didn’t have food for herself and her family. As she continued to talk, she began to cry and through her tears praised God because even though she didn’t have food for herself and her family, she has legs and can walk. She looked for the blessings in her life and didn’t wallow in the ways she and her family are suffering. I was able to give her a little food, but I think she helped me more than I helped her. She helped me to get my perspective back. Even though I suffer sometimes, I am united in Christ as well as with all those who suffer in some way. I realized that what I thought was a big burden is actually microscopic.

The last thing I would like to leave you with is something else I read this morning. “If we strove to stand firm in the struggles like men of valor we should not fail to experience the help of our Lord from heaven. For He is ever ready to help all who fight, trusting in His grace; He also affords us occasions to fight that we may conquer.” Imitation of Christ. Stand firm in your struggles and cry out to the Lord in faith, knowing that He is an all-loving Father who hears your pleas and will rescue you. Fight so that you may conquer!

Let My People Return To Me

I feel as though I've written about this over and over again, and I'm sure that I have, so if I'm sounding like a broken record to you, I apologize. In June 2010, after my big conversion and call to missions, I feel as though I was on the highest of highs because of the things the Lord was doing for me and in me. For the remainder of 2010, the Lord was so close, I could literally feel Him walking with me some days. Lately and actually for most of this year, it hasn't been like that, and I know that we don't always feel the Lord close. I know that this walk of life isn't about feelings, but something much more. I must admit that one of the reasons I haven't felt the Lord close is my own fault. I haven't been as committed to Him as He deserves. I know some of you might be thinking, "Well Sarah, you left everything you knew to follow the Lord. You moved to Mexico. You are working closely with the people there and serving the Lord." Well if you are thinking that, those things are true, but it isn't about what I'm doing, it's about my heart.

Somewhere during this year I subconsciously decided that my heart didn't fully belong to the Lord, and because of this I've become divided. I go into my prayer time, most of the time, completely distracted and sort of go through the motions. I feel as though my heart isn't in it. About a month and a half ago, the Lord started giving me scriptures about returning to Him, and I thought, "Lord, I'm right here, what do you mean???" Still the scriptures came. I started asking Him a month and a half ago, "Lord, show me what you mean by return to you, show me how you want me to return." I've known pretty much the whole time how He wants me to return to Him, but remember I'm stubborn, so I'm going to fight until I hit some kind of bottom. Well, the bottom has come.

In the middle of August I was privileged to spend two weeks with my family. I don't think words could express how good it was to see my own family and to just spend time with them. It was much needed. My last night in the States I was praying and just opened my bible. I opened to Isaiah 57:14 where it says, "The Lord says, 'Let my people return to me. Remove every obstacle from their path! Build the road and make it ready.'" I knew that He was speaking directly to me and asking me to return to Him. This time I also knew and decided it was time to surrender my stubborness.

The following morning I decided to reread the verse the Lord used to speak to the night before and also decided to read the full chapter of Isaiah 57. The title of this chapter is "Israel's Idolatry is condemned". The first two verses talk about how good people die and when they die, they rest in peace because of their good lives. Verse 3 really spoke to me. It says, "Come here to be judged, you sinners! You are no better than sorcerers, adulterers, and prostitutes." What a strong statement. I am no better than sorcerers, adulterers, and prostitutes. After reading about the idolatry in Israel's life, I began to see the idolatry in my own life over the last year. I've allowed sleep, books, movies, spending time with friends and family, amongst many other things to become idols in my life causing my heart to be divided. I'm not saying that any of the before mentioned things in and of themselves are bad, but if they are causing my relationship with the Lord to falter, I need to check myself!

I don't want you to think that I haven't been praying, because I have. Each day I do pray, but I haven't been dedicating myself to a set time, a "date", with the Lord, I've just been fitting Him in where I can. When I really think about that and imagine what a relationship with a friend here on earth would be like if I only fit the other person into my schedule when it was convenient for me, the relationship would die; of course it is the same with the Lord. "...love the Lord your God with all your heat, with all you soul, with all your strength, and all your mind..." Luke 10:27

For me to return fully to my Lord, I am dedicating myself to a set time each day to seek Him and read His word. I would like to challenge you, if you have turned away from the Lord, to return to Him as well, because the only place we can truly feel at home is in His loving arms. "Yet even now, says the Lord, return to me with your WHOLE heart..." Joel 2:12

One More Saint in Heaven

The past few weeks have been full and have had a few curve balls. I'm sure you are curious about the title of this blog, but I truly do believe it is true. In the last two and a half weeks the Lord has called two of our home-visits HOME. I believe that there are two more saints in Heaven praising our Lord Jesus and praying for us all that are still here on earth. Today I really want to share a little about Doña Raquel.

About three weeks ago Erika and I went to Doña Raquel's house for a visit. We normally visit each person on our list once every fifteen days. Normally when we visit Doña Raquel we also get to visit with her niece Doña Maria, but this time Doña Maria was in Saltillo because she was ill. Doña Raquel is the sweetest little lady. While we were visiting her this time she told us that she was 86 years old and that the Lord had given her such a long life. She showed us a special place in her room where she had placed several medals representing miracles that she has seen the Lord do. All the little bronze things on the red fabric are the medals.
During our visit with her, she started talking about wanting to go to the hospital because she was having pain in her head and legs. We asked her if she wanted us to take her on the following Tuesday. The day we visited her was a Saturday. She said sure. The following Tuesday we went to her house to get her and she started telling us how she normally goes to the hospital on Saturday and Sunday's because there isn't much of wait. Even though she was saying this she had all of her things gathered ready to go. Erika asked her, "Doña Raquel, if you would rather, we can come back on Saturday." Of course Doña Raquel replied saying, "whatever you want." We decided to leave.

We didn't even make it all the way down the street when both Erika and I had this strong feeling in our hearts that we needed to turn around and get her and bring her to the hospital that very day. Thank God we listened to that feeling. I'm learning the importance of following the holy Spirit when He nudges. We picked her up and headed to the hospital. We had to wait for about an hour and a half and the whole time Doña Raquel was making small conversation and acting pretty normal. As soon as we made it to a room and the doctor walked in Doña Raquel started coughing up blood and the vomiting blood. They immediately admitted her and said she would need to go to Saltillo in an ambulance. They asked us if we knew where her family was and we didn't.

For the following three hours or so Toñio, one of our friends, and I searched around town trying to find someone who was family for Doña Raquel while Erika stayed by her side. During this time I was so sad to think that this sweet little lady was so sick and didn't have one family member at her side. I kept thinking that she was all alone and of course this also made me think of my own grandmother who is sick right now and how much that would hurt my heart if she ever felt left behind or all alone. After all the searching we weren't able to find any family so Erika and I decided we would go with her in the ambulance because she was getting worse, needed better healthcare in the hospital in Saltillo, and couldn't go alone in the ambulance. We were all loaded up in the ambulance and started on our way when the driver suddenly stopped. Toñio had found one of Doña Raquel's nieces, so she took our place in the ambulance.

Erika and I returned home after about five or six hours at the hospital feeling spiritually, mentally and physically exhausted. I headed up to the chapel in our house to pray and cry before the Lord and he led me to scripture that comforted me. I was still so upset at the thought of Doña Raquel being forgotten by her family. I was reading Psalm 56:9 which says, "My wanderings you have noted; are my tears not stored in your vial, recorded in your book." I was struck by this and decided to read the footnote on this scripture. The foot note says that the saying "Are my tears not stored in your vial is a unique saying in the Old Testament. The context suggest that the tears are saved because they are precious; God puts a high value on each of the psalmist's troubles." Both the verse and footnote gave me so much peace because I felt that the Lord was saying, "Sarah, not once have I left Doña Raquel's side. Even though it seems that her family has forgotten her, I never have. I know each and every tear that she has shed and they are all precious to Me. I am right there with her and I will not leave her side."

We received news on the following Thursday that Doña Raquel had passed away. We were able to attend the small funeral and I know that she is now in Heaven without any pain at all praising her Savior. I know that Doña Raquel is watching over us all and praying for us.

"It is the Lord who marches before you; he will be with you and will never fail you or forsake you. So do not fear or be dismayed." Deuteronomy 31:8

Sometimes You Have to Eat Goat Soup and Ride a Donkey :)

Sorry it has been so long since I've updated my blog. Time has just slipped away. It's not an excuse I know....I will try harder to do a better job of keeping you all posted! Where to begin....??? A little over a month and a half ago Erika and I bought food in bulk to make dispensas (little bags of staples foods). Your donations have helped to feed 18 families. With our home visits, we have a two week rotation and visit 18 different families. Each time we visit we also bring a dispensa. We still have enough food to last us for one more month. Thank you so much for your generosity.Sorry for the messiness in the picture above. This is only a little of the food that your donations helped to buy :) Again, thanks! So, skipping over a lot of time and jumping into last week. We had our first short-term mission group since I've been here in General. It was a group of seminarians and two priests. When I heard that they were coming, I thought this should be interesting. Only being re-Catholic for a year, I haven't spent much time talking to priests or seminarians so I had this preconceived idea that they were really boring serious people who only talked about theology and things that were way over my head. Boy, was I wrong! The guys arrived on Saturday the 9th and were already speaking Spanish. Such a blessing! The first night we just relaxed, ate dinner and got to know one another. The next day started bright and early with mass at 7:30 and then visits to different Ranchos following. What blessed me most on that day is one of the seminarians Tim. He handed out balloons to the kids and played with them. When it was time for us to go to mass someone commented saying, "I hope the kids put the balloons away for mass." My thought was, "Are you kidding?? The kids in Mexico run up and down the isles during mass." I must admit that it is very distracting for me when the kids are loud and run around in mass and I've had very negative thoughts in the past, but Tim said, "Let the little children come to me..." quoting Matthew 19:14 Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Wow! That convicted my heart! The kids did bring their balloons in mass, but it didn't bother me this time when they walked around or played, I saw things a little differently. After mass some of the little ladies asked Father Tony to bless their houses. Several of the ladies also asked Father to pray for rain. When we got in the van and started our journey home, the skies opened up, it rained and hailed. We asked Father if he prayed for rain yet but he said he hadn't. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday we had retreats in two different ranchos. My group went to San Fransisco. Father Jos accompanied my group, so each day we had mass. I soon found out that Father Jos loves to tell jokes, but they are very hard to understand. You see, Father Jos is Indian and English is his second language with Portuguese being his third and Spanish his forth. A lot of the times his jokes were a mixture of all three languages. Even though I couldn't understand the jokes, they were still hilarious. Father Jos has a contagious laugh. Father Jos also did some bird dancing to get the birds out of the Chapel in San Fransisco and it worked almost every time! Each day that we went to the ranchos, Father offered confession. On Tuesday we followed Father as he blessed the houses in San Fransisco. On the last day there, after mass, we had a small little party. After the party, one of the women from the Rancho invited us to her house to have goat soup. I can honestly say that goat soup was quite an experience and I am very proud of each person in my group for eating what was set before them! Did I mention right before the goat soup that I got to ride a donkey??? Pictures will be up soon of that!In addition to our rancho visit to San Fransisco on Tuesday, we went to Guadalupe on Tuesday afternoon for mass. Before mass we were able to play soccer with the kids and also Martino (one of the seminarians) played the guitar and we sang praise and worship songs in Spanish with the kids. It was super blessed. I think what blessed me the most in that visit to Guadalupe was that one of the little girls that I normally have a really hard time with wanted me to hold her the whole time during mass. She is only two years old and so precious. Several times during mass she would give me hugs. It was the sweetest! After mass was finished, she grabbed my water bottle and wanted water. I told here there wasn't any more water, because I had just finished drinking the rest of it. She said yes there is more water and took my water bottle and left the chapel. She returned shortly with my water bottle filled with water. It wasn't purified water so of course I couldn't drink it, but it was so sweet. Thursday we had our pilgrimage day to Saltillo. Once we arrived, we headed straight to the miracle chapel and cathedral. Before entering we spent a little time with my friend Hugo at the gate of the miracle chapel. I am still amazed at how beautiful his smile is.Friday we had our desert day, and this year it didn't rain in the desert or dessert for me. I also didn't pray for rain, so that might have had something to do with it :) When we arrived at Tejocote, the place we had desert day, we had mass, outside. It was amazing! We had to build an altar out of rocks, and I just completely felt like I was in the old testament!After desert day, we returned home and had about an hour or so to rest before several of us set out to climb a "mountain". James was our leader and pretty much ran up the "mountain" in his flip flops and shorts. My journey up wasn't quite that easy. I got stuck on a few thorns and about half way up was thinking, "What have I gotten myself in to? I think I'm ready to get down now!" Once I made it to the top of the "mountain" the view alone was worth all the work it took to get up there. It was so beautiful! We even got to watch a rain storm rolling in. It truly was breath-taking. We decided we needed a "special" picture on top of the "mountain", so I hope you enjoy it! If this picture doesn't show that the seminarian group was special, I'm not sure if anything can! Throughout our week of serving General Cepeda together, there was a lot of crazy miscellaneousness going on. They completely joined in to our lifestyle of simplicity and it shined through with the games they played. One day they played toss the frisbee to hit the bell, another day the game was hackey sac baseball with broomsticks. Another game was who can get the hackey sac into the window first? One day while it was raining they took soap to the concrete slide and made it extra slippery to fly down. There were also many games of the Great Dalmuti with weird accents.

All in all, my week with the seminarians was extremely blessed. Each and everyone of them challenged me by the way they have devote themselves to the Lord and by doing the work that He has for them. They each lived out their faith so beautifully and it challenged me to make sure that I am living out my faith each and everyday. By the way, did I mention that when the group left on Saturday it stormed so much so that it caused 150 kids from Saltillo to have to spend the night in our house?? They were in General Cepeda for a vacation bible school and had plans to sleep outside in a camp. I think Father Tony finally prayed for rain!!!